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by Abigail Van Buren

Tax Preparer Urges Parents to Leave Deductions at Home

DEAR ABBY: I am 26-year-old woman and my best friend is 42. Her husband is insanely jealous when we do anything together. He's even jealous of me because I can make her laugh! He picks fights with her when we decide to do something -- he throws things, squeals his tires in the driveway, calls us lovers (which we are not), anything to get attention.

I am always on my best behavior when I'm at their house so as not to cause any trouble. This situation is not only frustrating, but it's making it difficult to remain friends. This has gone on for four years, and I don't know how much more I can tolerate. Abby, could you please point me in the right direction? -- AT MY WIT'S END, ALMA, MICH.

P.S. I don't think he's going to get therapy for this anytime soon.

DEAR WIT'S END: Your friend's husband is counting on the idea that his outrageous behavior will drive you away. If you haven't already done so, talk with your friend about how childish and controlling his behavior is. His attempt to isolate her friends is a form of abuse. Since it has reached the point of exceeding your level of tolerance, schedule your visits away from her home.

P.S. It's sad this man won't consider therapy. He needs it. Your friend could benefit from counseling, too, in order to understand why she tolerates his behavior.