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by Abigail Van Buren

Couple Thinks in Laws' Visit Is More About Money Than Love

DEAR ABBY: I am six months pregnant and will soon create a registry for baby gifts. I am not planning a baby shower, but would like to have the registry available to those who wish to buy gifts.

How do I let friends and family know I have a gift registry without also inviting them to a shower?

Without seeming rude, how can I let people know they can buy me gifts? It seems the only acceptable way to ask for baby gifts is to throw a party and send your registry card along with the invitations. -- MOM-TO-BE

DEAR MOM-TO-BE: To include a gift registry card with an invitation is considered a blatant request for a gift, and any blatant bid for gifts is a breach of etiquette.

Please remember that people don't "owe" you a gift simply because you are about to become a mother. Your friends and family are aware that they may buy you gifts without your having to mention it. Unless you want to appear greedy, say nothing about gifts unless someone asks you what you need for the baby.