Join the debate. Vote Now on the Dear Abby Poll of the week.

by Abigail Van Buren

Boss's Wandering Hands Are Pushing Teen Out the Door

DEAR ABBY: I am a 16-year-old girl and have a part-time job after school. From the look of things, I seem like a perfectly normal, happy teen-ager with everything going for me. My grades are honor roll. I have a loving family and caring friends.

However, things are not as they appear to be. My boss, a married man with three kids, is hugging, kissing and touching me in places he shouldn't be. I feel really uncomfortable at work and very intimidated. He does it in such a smooth way there is no way of stopping him. (It's hard to explain.) I don't want it to continue, and I'd like to quit this job.

The problem is, my family thinks this is the "dream job." I'm allowed to bring my homework and do it there. I work for only a few hours, and the work is easy. His family is nice to me, and his wife loves me like a sister.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. It has been a big burden keeping these feelings bottled up inside. I feel really frustrated, confused and used. Please help. -- INTIMIDATED IN TORONTO

DEAR INTIMIDATED: I don't blame you for feeling frustrated and confused. Your feelings are valid: You are being used. It makes me wonder how many of his other female employees are being subjected to his unwanted advances.

This man knows exactly what he's doing; he's taking advantage of your youth and inexperience. The name for it is sexual harassment. Do not help him by remaining passive and silent. Your parents should be told immediately. If you want to quit this job, you have my permission. But your parents should be told exactly why you chose to quit.