DEAR ABBY: I am a mother of three. The oldest is 9 years old. Although I don't know everything there is to know about parenting, I am hardly a novice.
I have been blessed with a youthful appearance, but that blessing is also a curse. I'm 36 but look 18, and I'm still asked for proof of age when I buy a bottle of cooking sherry. Also, because of my appearance, people assume that I know nothing about parenting and many of them proceed to offer advice. (Most advice-givers are older women, but a few older men do it, too.)
Abby, I find these encounters very annoying. I know my children and diligently tend to their needs. I neither need nor want the assistance or advice of strangers.
My advice to those who feel they must say something to a young mother: Say a prayer instead. -- THANKS BUT NO THANKS FOR ADVICE IN CHICAGO
DEAR THANKS: Every day I hear people complain that no one cares anymore. Obviously, those who offer you well-meaning advice care enough to want to help you. Give them credit for that. You may one day feel that sharing your experience could benefit a younger parent, and perhaps then you will see the gesture as less an intrusion and more a generosity of spirit.