Ask Someone Else's Mom by Susan Writer

Husband Down on Wife's Wanting to Find Part-Time Work

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Even before the pandemic, my husband wasn’t thrilled with the thought of my getting a job, even a part-time one. We have a one-year-old son, and right now no plans for another baby anytime soon.

For the first few months, I was totally happy being home with our baby full-time, but now I feel like I need to both get out of the house at least a few hours a week, and also have some money that I can contribute to our expenses.

My mom lives ten minutes away and said she would be happy to help with babysitting, and my mother-in-law said she would volunteer for back-up if there are days my mom can’t do it. I honestly don’t see any issues, but my husband keeps discouraging me. I know I have to wait a little bit longer for the world to be more normal, but do you think I am wrong to want to get out and be more help to our finances? --- NEED JUST A LITTLE JOB

DEAR NEED JUST A LITTLE JOB: Except for the current state of things, especially the job market, I don’t see anything wrong with what you’re hoping to do. However, you didn’t share why your husband doesn’t want you working, and his concerns need to be taken into account.

It might be he’s worried about a disruption of your home life, or that the childcare will fall on him. Whatever his concerns, you need to address them with solid, well-thought out responses.

Also, never discount the importance of holding down a home and anchoring a family. Either one can be a full-time job in itself. It may not seem like it, but providing your own childcare alone is a huge savings over the course of a year.

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