Ask Someone Else's Mom by Susan Writer

She Has a Crush on Her Grandma's Female Caregiver

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandma still lives in her own home, but she has health issues that are more than my grandpa can handle alone, so for the past few months they have had a home healthcare worker coming in a few hours a day to help out.

This girl is gorgeous, and more than a little sweet. I have a huge crush on her, but I can’t make a move in front of my grandparents because my parents don’t want them to know I am gay. They say they would not understand, and it would really upset them. I’m not sure if there is even any mutual interest, but I am getting some vibes that there might be, and I have started stopping by to visit most days after I finish with classes.

How do I take the first step without upsetting my grandparents? --- LIKE THE GIRL

DEAR LIKE THE GIRL: It’s possible your grandparents aren’t as clueless as you think they are. For instance, unless you were in the habit of stopping in to see them most days, your suddenly doing so could be a pretty good indicator you have an additional motive to visit.

If you’re feeling a connection with the caregiver, I don’t see any reason you can’t exchange contact information, just as you’d do with any other new acquaintance. If your grandparents have figured things out, they won’t be shocked, and if they haven’t, they’ll just think you two are striking up a friendship.

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