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Dad Is Hitting On Son’s Girlfriend

DEAR NATALIE: My boyfriend's dad hit on me last night at his parents' home. His dad cornered me in the kitchen and remarked at how sexy I looked and how if he was my boyfriend he wouldn't be able to keep his hands off of me. It was incredibly out of line, and I felt so uncomfortable the rest of the evening. 

When we got back to my boyfriend's, he asked me what was wrong, and I just mumbled that I had a stomachache. Should I tell him what happened? Do you think he will be mad? Maybe I should keep it to myself, but what if it happens again? -- DAD DRAMA

DEAR DAD DRAMA: I'm sorry this happened. How inappropriate and rude. This actually reminds me of a situation I found myself in when I was 17. My boyfriend's dad made some really awful remarks about me in front of my then-boyfriend, who merely shrugged it off and said that's just how his dad was. It became a point of contention in our relationship and later contributed to our breakup. 

The bottom line is you don't need to put up with that disgusting behavior. In fact, not only tell your boyfriend that it happened, but also that you are not comfortable going over to his parents' home anymore unless his dad apologizes and keeps his distance. 

I know a lot of people may roll their eyes at this -- "Oh, get over it." "It's not a big deal." "She's just uptight." But none of that is true. You didn't deserve to be sexually harassed by your boyfriend's dad, and you have every right to feel uncomfortable and violated. If you keep it to yourself and it happens again, then what? Better to clear the air now, hold your ground and be ready to recognize that if your boyfriend doesn't take your side on this, it's only a red flag for what's to come. 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: A business card is nice, but a business card with your photo on it? Priceless! Think of how many cards you throw away because you can't remember who the person was or why you connected. Putting your photo on the card reminds people of who you are and makes it more likely that you will stand out from the crowd. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

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