DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in my late 50s, and all my children are in college or have recently graduated. My life used to be a balancing act of taking care of my children and working. Now that my three children are all gone, I have a lot of free time. I'm at a loss because my entire identity seems to be consumed by the role of a mother, and I have no clue what to do with this newfound freedom.
The idea of filling my days without the constant demands of parenting is freeing but also a bit daunting. How can I rediscover myself and find a new sense of purpose in this new stage of life? I'm struggling to find activities or interests that resonate with me and don’t make me feel silly for trying them this late. What should I do to make this process less sad and difficult for me? -- Next Chapter
DEAR NEXT CHAPTER: This is a pivotal moment for you, and naturally it’s scary. Step back for a moment and examine your life. Other than your children, who are you close to? Friends? Family members? What hobbies or activities used to intrigue you? What interests you today? You are going to have to make a big effort to figure this out. Look in your local newspaper or on community bulletin boards online to find highlights of the week and month. Schedule yourself to go to some of them. Reach out to people you haven’t communicated with in a while to get together. Consider joining a club or group of people who enjoy doing something you like. At first, this may feel awkward, but over time if you stick with it, you will create a broader group of people with whom you can engage and build this next phase of your life.