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Husband's Mental Health Frightens Wife Into a Divorce

DEAR ABBY: I am in the process of a divorce from my husband who cuts himself. Recently, he had an episode that resulted in a 72-hour hold for evaluation in a hospital. This is more than I can handle. My fear is finding him dead one morning. He says he loves me and wants to work things out, and he promises to stop (he's promised before). Am I being selfish for wanting out? -- SELFISH IN SACRAMENTO

DEAR SELFISH: Promising to stop self-harming behavior is not enough. Unless your husband is willing to get the necessary psychotherapy it will take for him to keep his promise, nothing will change. As it stands, I don't think it's selfish to want to escape from a situation in which you are helpless. The question is, if your husband is willing to get the help he needs and shows he is following through, would it have any effect on your decision to divorce him?

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