DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been separated for a year and I have filed for divorce. We have reached an agreement about everything except one thing: our tortoise. This may seem strange, but Herbert has always been our "child." I think of him as my kid, and I believe my husband when he says he loves him that much, too. We got Herbert as a baby that fit into the palm of my hand. Herbert is now 9, very large and lives in the backyard in a "doghouse" structure.
The problem is, my husband still wants to see Herbert. He agrees that he will visit only when I am not at home. I don't distrust him or worry he will try to take Herbert, but I just don't want him here.
I know that if Herbert is mine legally, I won't have to let anyone see him. Once our divorce is final, I want nothing more to do with my husband and he knows that. But it's like telling someone he could never see his kid again. I'd really like to know your thoughts. -- NICOLE IN SANFORD, FLA.
DEAR NICOLE: Because you can't split Herbert in half, why not consider shared custody? If your husband can provide a safe place for the tortoise to stay while he's with "Daddy," you could work out an agreement so that you could exchange your "kid" at a neutral place -- such as your veterinarian's office -- and you wouldn't have to see your husband and vice versa.