DEAR HARRIETTE: I overheard two people at my job talking about me like a dog. They were criticizing my personal style and little things about my life -- not my work, mind you. It was petty, but it sounded pretty vicious. I have no idea why they were going for me like that. I keep to myself and do my work. I don’t socialize with them because I have to get home and take care of my family. Most of them are younger and single. I give them their space, which I thought was the right thing to do. Now it seems that my quietness may be causing them to pass judgment. Should I call them out on their comments or take another approach to dealing with them? -- Catty Co-Workers
DEAR CATTY CO-WORKERS: Perhaps they are grumbling about you because you don’t engage them. If you want to make the effort to build bonds with your co-workers, you may want to start talking to them a little bit. Start by greeting them in the morning. A simple “good morning” with a smile and eye contact counts for a lot. You can compliment them on things they are wearing that you genuinely like. Don’t be fake, though. See if little overtures soften their perception of you.
If they continue, you should ask them to stop. Tell them that you have heard their mean comments and would appreciate it if they would pick something else to talk about. If it gets really bad, report them to H.R.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)