Sense & Sensitivity by Harriette Cole

Woman Sends Disturbing Video on Facebook

DEAR HARRIETTE: Someone sent me a Facebook message that included a disturbing video. Her preface was that it was horrible and that we, the people she had sent it to, should watch it and share it broadly. I rarely follow these kinds of directions, but I was compelled to watch the video. I am so sorry that I did. The video featured an infant being slapped, beaten and ultimately strangled. It was in close-up and not fake. It was the most horrible thing I have ever seen.

I wrote to the woman who sent it, telling her she needed to report it to the police immediately. When I went back to see if she responded, the whole post was gone. Maybe Facebook took it down. I don’t know. Is there anything else I should have done? I really wish that woman hadn’t posted that video. I can’t get it out of my mind. -- Horror on Social Media

DEAR HORROR ON SOCIAL MEDIA: Some things should never happen, let alone be seen. What you have described is a heinous crime that should never have been posted on Facebook -- or anywhere else. It is likely that Facebook took it down on its own.

What you could have done is to report the video yourself to Facebook by looking for their reporting link. Then you could call the police and point them to what you saw.

According to an article by journalist Kellie Cowan, "Suspicious content should be reported to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. The agency has a secure cyber tip line ( or you can call 1-800-843-5678. It will alert the right people while ensuring a tipster stays on the right side of the law and is not unwittingly re-victimizing the child by spreading images of their abuse."

Parent Wants to Guide Son's Choices in Politics

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son turns 18 this year, and I want him to get involved in the political process. He is interested and has been since he was in middle school. My husband and I are longtime Democrats, and we participated in the last presidential election, canvassing for Hillary Clinton, often bringing our son along.

Now that Democratic candidates are throwing their hats in the ring for the 2020 presidential election, there are many people to consider supporting. How can I help to guide my son’s choices during this time? -- Son in the Game

DEAR SON IN THE GAME: You should not try to point your son toward a particular candidate. Instead, encourage him to do his own research about each of them so that he can make informed choices as the race builds momentum. He should research candidates on both sides of the aisle, too.

When he is equipped with details about each candidate’s positions on important matters, he will be ready to make an informed decision. That’s how you can guide him.

You can also debate the issues with your son and engage him as he learns about the people who are running. The more you know, the better you will be able to demonstrate to him what you believe and how much research you have done.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)