DEAR HARRIETTE: My 14-year-old daughter’s best friend wears provocative clothing all the time. She is tall and thin and often wears short shorts or mini-dresses and high heels. I think it’s because she has an older sister and wants to compete with her. In the end, it’s hard for me to let my daughter hang out with her. I don’t let my daughter dress like that. I’m no prude, but I teach her about modesty. It seems like this other girl’s parents just let her do whatever she wants. I do tell my daughter when I think her friend is dressed inappropriately, but I wonder if I should say something to her parents. -- Too Provocative, Dallas
DEAR TOO PROVOCATIVE: Your daughter is at an impressionable age, yes, but she still has your guidance and support. I wouldn’t ban her from hanging out with this girl. If she believes she is her best friend, she will likely try to spend time with her anyway. You should continue telling your daughter what the boundaries of appropriateness are in your house. Be careful not to judge her friend. Just say what your guidelines are and where you draw the line.
In terms of telling the friend’s parents, be careful. It is likely that they know what their daughter is wearing and have allowed it. You have influence over your daughter. Stay focused on her.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)