DEAR HARRIETTE: My dad is 67, and he hasn't been to the doctor in two to three years. I’m worried about his health, but he doesn't seem to care in the slightest. He’s getting older by the day, and I want to make sure he is in tip-top shape for my wedding. It might seem a little selfish, but I care for his well-being, and I want to make sure that he is OK. He said to me one time that he is scared to walk into the doctor’s office because he is afraid he might never come out.
I am already stressed with everything going on for my wedding, and I don't want to rearrange things because my dad might not be healthy enough. How can I convince him to get a checkup? -- Dad Vs. Wedding Stress, Akron, Ohio
DEAR DAD VS. WEDDING STRESS: You are dealing with two major stressors at the same time. Getting married is at the top of the list. Most couples have difficulty managing their wedding plans without a high degree of tension. Adding your father’s possible health concerns only exacerbates things.
Know that you cannot control him. You cannot force him to go to the doctor, so stop obsessing over it. Instead, talk to him about his role in the wedding, and include him in your wedding plans. Stop trying to force him to do anything. Pray that he will remain in good health.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)