DEAR HARRIETTE: I have three daughters, all very healthy and happy girls. My middle daughter has always been obsessed with how she looks, whether that’s her hair, skin or makeup. Over the past couple of months, she has become overly concerned with her weight. It has gotten to the point where I am worried about her. She looks thin, which can be a good thing when you can afford to lose some weight, but she did not need to lose any. Everyone keeps complimenting her on how great she looks, which I am afraid is just motivating her to lose more weight. I want to talk to her about it, but I don’t want to come off as attacking her appearance. -- Concerned About Daughter's Weight, Richmond, Virginia
DEAR CONCERNED ABOUT DAUGHTER’S WEIGHT: Don’t wait to talk to your daughter. You can compliment her on something that you believe is worthy of note, and then ask her about her eating habits. Tell her you have noticed that she has lost a lot of weight recently and that you are concerned that she is going too far. Ask her what she has changed. Try to get her to tell you what she eats every day. If you are worried that she may have an eating disorder, ask her directly -- though she may not tell you the truth. Depending on her responses, you may want to schedule a physical so that a medical professional can assess her health.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)