Sense & Sensitivity by Harriette Cole

Busy Parent Needs to Take Time for Self-Care

DEAR HARRIETTE: I practice meditation and do my best to stay calm in difficult situations. Lately, I feel like I am losing the battle. I have been in ugly arguments with co-workers at my job -- about legitimate issues, but I don’t like how they have gotten under my skin. I can attribute their caustic behavior to our boss, who is extremely difficult to work with. If I am honest, I have questions about her integrity. Recently, I witnessed her lying to another co-worker and then berating that co-worker for something that was the boss’s mistake. I feel like no amount of meditation can make the crazy stuff that happens at work OK. What can I do to maintain my sanity? -- Off the Edge, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR OFF THE EDGE: While meditation can be extremely helpful in stilling the mind and keeping you grounded, sometimes you need to take additional action. If you believe that you are working in a place that is unhealthy for you, you should consider working somewhere else. You don’t need to be impulsive about it, but make a plan. Consciously work to find a new place of employment that better matches your values. Until you find that new job, stay where you are.

Allow your meditation practice to help you stay strong and not take the assaults to your and others’ integrity personally. Bide your time, but prepare to leave.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)