Sense & Sensitivity by Harriette Cole

Tone-Deaf Son Wants to Join Choir

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son is tone deaf. It’s no issue for us in the family, but I’m worried about him now. He told me he wants to join the chorus at his school because all his friends are doing it. I know that the chorus is fairly large, but I worry that he will be rejected or humiliated. My son is a confident 8-year-old. I don’t want him to lose his self-confidence if other kids start poking at him. Should I discourage the chorus idea? -- He Can’t Sing, Milwaukee

DEAR HE CAN’T SING: Do not dash your son’s hopes. At his age, being part of a chorus may be perfectly fine. The teacher will figure out immediately what his abilities are. The teacher may even be able to cultivate hidden talent in him. Plenty of children have sung in school choruses who would never be invited to become solo singers. In fact, in some elementary schools, all children must participate in chorus. This is to foster camaraderie. If your son confidently does his best, that may help him to ward off any students who poke fun at him.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

Read more in: Family & Parenting | Work & School | Miscellaneous