DEAR HARRIETTE: I got a call late last night that my daughter was arrested while on spring break. I am incredibly disappointed in her, but her crime was nonviolent and will be taken off her record. She is of legal drinking age and got caught drinking on the beach. She paid her own bail. Should I punish her? I am honestly just grateful this wasn't any worse. -- Minor Offense, Jackson, Mississippi
DEAR MINOR OFFENSE: Punishment for an adult is tough to enforce. What is more important is to talk to your daughter about what happened. Have her share with you the experience of what occurred, including the arrest and time spent in jail. Talk to her about it in as much detail as she is willing to share. Find out if she knew that it was illegal to drink on the beach. This may not be common knowledge.
Your daughter needs to have clarification on right and wrong, as this is one of the lessons that will come to her in one way or another throughout her life. It is imperative for your daughter to think about her actions and the potential consequences, especially as it relates to alcohol. She should learn where is it illegal to drink or even carry opened bottles of alcohol (which includes her vehicle) and be aware of who will be the designated driver if she is in the company of a party of drinkers.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)