DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband has secretly been planning a romantic getaway for the two of us. I am incredibly stressed from work and rarely sleep more than five hours a night. I know my husband has been planning this trip because he uses my Travelocity account, and I get email notifications. Honestly, I feel too tired and stressed to take this trip. The thought of missing a day of work makes my head pound. I cannot fall behind on responsibilities.
I don't want to crush my husband's heart, but I don't want him to pay for the trip and then hear that I can't come. Should I mention that I know what he's doing and that I'll be ready for a vacation next winter? I just can't see many things slowing down for me soon. I know he is being incredibly sweet, but I don't want to waste a vacation stressed about work. -- Bound to the Office, St. Louis
DEAR BOUND TO THE OFFICE: Don't be too hasty. Your husband may be trying to save your life -- literally. Rather than discouraging him, why not tell him that you see what he is doing, thank him for his effort and tell him you will go but you cannot take a day off. Agree that you will go on a weekend getaway. While there, put work aside. It may seem impossible right now, but I bet it will be worth it for your health, your marriage and even your job.