DEAR HARRIETTE: My landlord lives in the apartment below me in a three-family home.
It was my boyfriend's birthday recently, and I hosted the celebration, with 15 people. This was on a Friday evening, and we were all wrapped up by 11 p.m. On Saturday, I got a knock on my door and learned my landlord was mad at me for having people over. He told me he doesn't condone "huge house parties," and that I kept him up. My rent isn't cheap, and I don't think I did anything wrong by having people over once for a celebration. I want to stand up for myself because I think my landlord is accusing me of being a bad tenant because I am young and hosted one small celebration. -- Last Friday Night, Dallas
DEAR LAST FRIDAY NIGHT: Rather than getting into an argument with your landlord, you can apologize for any disturbance your celebration may have caused him. Then point out that you rarely entertain. This was a special occasion, and it wasn't a large group.
In the future, let your landlord know in advance if you are hosting a party. Honestly, whenever you can, it is wise to invite the neighbors to parties because that cuts down on them being annoyed by whatever disturbance the event may cause. Obviously, it would not be appropriate to have your landlord come to your boyfriend's dinner party. But possibly inviting him over for a toast before the evening began might have softened him up.
Everybody lives on a different schedule. Your 11 p.m. Friday evening ending time seemed respectful to you. Obviously, it was annoying to him. You will need to work together toward a middle ground in the future. Giving him the heads-up is a great start.