Sense & Sensitivity by Harriette Cole

Drifting Reader Wants To Settle Down

DEAR HARRIETTE: Over the past two years, I have had five jobs across the United States. Every time I take a job, I say to myself: This is the dream job, and this is where I want to live. However, after the third month of employment, I get bored, and I start to make plans to find another place of employment. This is getting tiresome because I am 45 years old, and I would like to settle down and eventually start a family. How can I find some solace in settling down? Can you offer any advice? -- Drifting Memory, Baton Rouge, Louisiana

DEAR DRIFTING MEMORY: Let this be your wake-up call. For whatever reason, you have been running away from responsibility for a long time. Stop for a moment and write out a list of your choices in recent years. Make another list of your desires for the future. Compare your lists to see how you can make them compatible. To "settle down" and start a family requires a level of consistent responsibility in order for you to be successful. Perhaps your "dream job" needs to look different. Consider what your dream really is. Allow your answer to guide your steps. If your dream truly is to share and build a life with someone, look for a job that can support that.

(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

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