DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, one of my friends decided to clean out her closet and allow any friend to take what they wanted. As she was sending us pictures of the clothing, she slowly decided she wanted money for all of these items. She waited until everyone decided which clothes they wanted to tell us she wanted compensation, and now everyone is in an awkward spot. These worn clothes are in good shape and fashionable -- but they're still secondhand. Additionally, she is trying to sell us some of her used bras! While the undergarments may have been expensive purchases originally, worn underwear is not something to charge people for. Is there a kind way to remind her that this is all used clothing, or do I have to bow out of this whole exchange to avoid getting ripped off? -- Firsthand Confusion About Secondhand Clothing, Boston
DEAR FIRSTHAND CONFUSION: Go the direct route. Tell your friend that she changed the rules on you, and you no longer want the items. Explain that since she offered the items for free and later decided to charge, you don't think that's fair, even though is her prerogative. Don't go into what she should charge for and what she shouldn't. Keep it simple. She changed the rules, and you have now changed your mind.