DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who likes me a lot and who is also a colleague. She hires me frequently to work on her productions. Well, through another colleague, I learned that her father just died. I never really met her father, but I feel like I should show up for the funeral because she is my friend. She and I haven't talked for about six months, which is normal. Still, I feel a little awkward about attending, considering I didn't know him. Do you think it is OK for me to go to pay my respects? It is an open funeral. -- Should I Go? Los Angeles
DEAR SHOULD I GO: Do attend the funeral. Obviously, do not sit with the family. Give them their space. At the same time, be sure to greet your friend and express your condolences. She will likely be very pleased to see you in the swell of people who come to pay their respects.
The times when it would be inappropriate for you to attend such a service include if it were listed as private or if some kind of friction existed between you and this woman or any of her family such that there might be discomfort for anyone present.