DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend of mine wanted to give me a tie as a gift, but I did not accept it because of the design. She was taken aback because of my answer, and I think I hurt her feelings in the process. Do you think I am a snob because I did not like the style of the tie? -- Fashion Forward, Jackson, Mississippi
DEAR FASHION FORWARD: I think you were incredibly insensitive to your friend. What was important was that she wanted to give you a gift. You could have accepted the gift, thanked her for it and let that be that. Later, if she were to ask you why you haven't worn the tie, you could then tell her that as much as you appreciate her thoughtfulness and generosity, the tie was not really your style. A delayed reality check would at least have afforded her the opportunity to know fully that you appreciate her thinking of you and wanting to give you something.
In this case, you may want to double back to her to apologize for not being sensitive to her feelings. Remind her of your gratitude for her good intentions.