The subject of pets on the bed always makes me laugh, thinking of an old relationship and the new bed that arrived after we'd already split.
The bed in question was the biggest bed I could find. When informed that it would take three months to be manufactured and delivered, I kiddingly asked the man in my life if he would be there when the bed arrived, even though I already had a feeling he wouldn't be.
"Oh sure," he said. "And if I'm not, you have plenty of pets to take up all that space. They'll love it."
Which, of course, is exactly what came to pass.
I'm not sure what that says about the relative constancy of romantic relationships and pets, but I have to give the man credit for being right. The animals did indeed love the big new bed -- and they still do, even if they have to share it.
Every now and then I hear from someone who wants me to write about how awful it is to have dogs or cats on the bed. I've had grandparents who want to convince their sons or daughters that a pet on the bed is unhealthy for children, and new sweethearts who disagree about where a pet should sleep.
"To have pets in the house is bad enough," wrote one frustrated woman, who clearly had much larger issues with her daughter than the younger woman's pets. "But to have them on the bed? That's dirty and disgusting!"
Such folks won't find much agreement from me. I like having pets on the bed. In the wintertime, my cats and dogs are like heating pads I don't have to plug in or recharge -- and they'll readjust automatically every time I move. This surely won't mollify anyone who believes pets are disgusting, but I've always kept things clean by putting a washable cover on top of the bedding to catch all the dirt and stray hair.
Still, there are good reasons to keep your pets off the bed, and maybe even out of the bedroom -- among them, behavioral problems and allergies.
For dogs who want to be bossy, allowing access to the bed isn't recommended, since it gives the animal the idea that he has status equal to -- or better than -- the human family members. For these dogs, sleeping elsewhere will likely be part of a retraining program to modify the animal's exalted opinion of his own value. (As with all such issues, please work with a veterinary behaviorist or trainer with experience in aggression to modify the dangerous behavior of such a pet.)
For people with allergies, turning the bedroom into a pet-free zone is common medical advice that ought to be followed. Maintaining a pet-free bedroom is part of an overall strategy to minimize the impact of pet dander. It will allow allergy sufferers to sleep without sneezing or wheezing, and awake rested without allergy symptoms or headaches. For these pet lovers, keeping pets out of the bedroom gives them enough "breathing room" to make it possible to keep both their pets and their overall good health.
And what about those couples who don't have pet-behavior problems or allergies, but still argue over letting their pets on the bed? That's the sort of thing you have to work out for yourself, since I have enough work giving pet advice without venturing into relationship counseling.
If you're lucky, though, you'll be able to find a bed big enough for everyone to be happy in.
Q&A
Poinsettias
are not poison
Q: Dr. Becker made a mistake recently on "Good Morning America." My veterinarian handed me a list of plants to watch out for when I got my puppy a few years ago and poinsettias were definitely on it. Please tell your readers before someone's pet is killed! -- via e-mail
A: There's no mistake. According to the Animal Poison Control Center (www.aspca.org/apcc), the poinsettia can cause little more than a bad tummy ache, even if ingested in fairly large amounts. That doesn't mean you should put poinsettia foliage into the food processor and then add it to your pet's dish, but it does mean that you can quit worrying that the plant your aunt gave you for the holidays is going to do in your dog. -- Dr. Marty Becker
Q: Our two-story house has a loft that overlooks the living room. The ledge for the loft opening is more than 20 feet off the ground. Our recently adopted 6-month-old kitten jumps on the ledge every time she's in the room. We are afraid she may attempt to jump off the ledge, or fall and injure herself. -- via e-mail
Do you think she would actually jump?
A: You're right to be concerned: Studies of cats falling from buildings (for example, off an apartment balcony) show that the animals are often injured more in falls from relatively low heights than from those a couple of floors higher, presumably because they haven't the time to rotate themselves into "landing position" to minimize potential injury. (The benefit of being higher only goes so far, since cats falling from more than a handful of stories up are usually seriously injured or killed.)
Kittens don't have the common sense that an older cat does, so I think it is entirely possible she might jump or be startled into falling. Try covering the ledge and, especially, the approach to it with something sticky, such as upside-down contact paper secured with double-sided tape. Cats loathe having their paws stick to anything, which is why sticky substances are great for discouraging furniture scratching as well.
I'm guessing your above-it-all kitten will decide that her perch isn't a place that's worth visiting if she has to step on sticky paper to get there. -- Gina Spadafori
Do you have a pet question? Send it to petconnection@gmail.com.
THE BUZZ
A baby changes
the priorities
-- Having a baby affects the way a pet is treated, according to a survey of 600 pet-owning parents by researchers at Indiana University's South Bend Campus. The research found people were more likely to refer to a pet as a child before a baby joined the family; afterward, they were less likely to hold that view. However, the research also found older people reported that their relationships with their pets grew stronger once the children grew up and left home.
-- A little more than half of baby boomers say pet care is a basic need, according to a study by MainStay Investments. To put this in context, 43 percent feel the same way about a professional hair color and cut; 38 percent about dining out. Providing for the education of children and grandchildren came in at 42 percent.
-- Animal charities have been hit hard by the economic downturn, according a recent economic study by GuideStar USA. The organization collected 7,000 responses from IRS-recognized nonprofits, 5 percent of which were pet-related. The study found 40 percent of nonprofits reported a decrease in donations in the first five months of 2010 as compared to 2009. The demand for the help requested from the charities increased 63 percent in the same period. -- Dr. Marty Becker and Mikkel Becker
ABOUT PET CONNECTION
Pet Connection is produced by a team of pet-care experts headed by "Good Morning America" and "The Dr. Oz Show" veterinarian Dr. Marty Becker and award-winning journalist Gina Spadafori. The two are also the authors of many best-selling pet-care books. Dr. Becker can also be found at Facebook.com/DrMartyBecker or on Twitter at DrMartyBecker.