DEAR MISS MANNERS: I live in a condominium association of 241 homes that is governed by a board of owners. I am running for election to the board, having served previously as an officer.
When I sent a campaign email to the owners, I received a reply from a former board member. (He ran for reelection and lost, and is not a candidate now.) He emailed me: “STOP SENDING ME YOUR B.S. AND LIES, EVERYONE KNOWS YOU ARE FULL OF IT AND YOU WILL LOOSE (sic) LIKE THE LAST 2 TIMES YOU TRIED.”
What, if anything, does etiquette say about the response that I should make? Should I:
1. Do nothing; ignore his email.
2. Respond with one of the following: A. You make my point about the lack of civility in discussing issues at the homeowners’ association. When you compose yourself, I would be pleased to meet to discuss your views. B. Could you specifically identify the statements you claim are untrue? C. As you requested, you are removed from my email list.
GENTLE READER: Relationships with fellow condominium owners carry all of the disadvantages of family (you did not, for the most part, choose them, and it is difficult to avoid them) with few of the benefits (unless, perhaps, they are willing to watch your cat while you take a much-needed vacation from them).
Miss Manners therefore proposes the Crazy Uncle Solution, which is to serve your rude neighbor his figurative turkey and let him sit in the corner, while you enlist everyone else’s help and sympathy to minimize the damage he can cause. In this case, that means option 1.B. -- ignoring his letter but pursuing your goal of respectful behavior at meetings.