DEAR MISS MANNERS: Several years ago, I became friends with a lovely person who knocked on my door as part of her ministry. I, myself, subscribe to a different religion, and my husband of 33 years is agnostic. I respect all denominations, but here’s the rub:
My friend called me yesterday, claiming that her good friend lost a pet, and was inconsolable. She knows I do talk therapy for people who don’t have resources for grieving a pet, so I called the third party.
Imagine my surprise when I was given a lecture about having to give up my beliefs in order to avoid hellfire. By the way, I’m not a Satanist. I’m a Catholic.
Is there a reasonable way to nip this issue in the bud? I have no problem with what others believe; more power to them. But I don’t enjoy strangers showing up at my door, unannounced, with pamphlets.
I’m probably overreacting, but it was therapeutic to write this out, at least.
GENTLE READER: Please assure Miss Manners that your friend is not promoting religion by lying to trap you with another proselytizer. Surely there was a miscommunication involved.
After all, your friendship apparently began by just such an approach. So you will have to explain to your friend that despite the good fortune of having met her through her unsolicited mission, you are not willing to admit others on such a basis. And then you may ask how the bereaved owner of a deceased pet managed to think otherwise.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)