DEAR MISS MANNERS: Over the years, I have been asked to give advice on various people’s paths through life, based on my own. There is no conversation I am less inclined to have, since I have little available time, am repelled by the idea of discussing my private affairs with a complete stranger, and consider that I am in no position to advise anyone.
Yet such an interview has been proposed by more than one young person, or the young person’s relative, as if there were a generally accepted social obligation to accede to it. When I say that I am sorry but I cannot, they appear surprised and offended.
Can Miss Manners suggest a more delicate way of refusing such a request, which is not meant to be, but that I consider to be, offensively intrusive and an unwarranted imposition on my time?
GENTLE READER: Intrusive? Is it possible that there are people left on this self-publicizing Earth who do not want to regale unsuspecting audiences with all the minutiae of their lives? Miss Manners is torn between admiration and admonition -- the latter for the fact that you do not find it flattering to want to be emulated.
However, she will help you out by arming you with this sentence if you promise to utter it kindly: “I am flattered, but I am afraid that my life’s path, in all of its lengthy details, would bore you. If you have a specific question about my field, I would be happy to answer it.” Then, at the very least, your admirers will have to go away for a while and do some research before attempting to bother you again.