DEAR MISS MANNERS: I commute by bicycle, and I walk many miles on the sidewalks of the dense inner city in which I live and work. I often call out expressions of encouragement to the people I observe in traffic, such as, “You go, girl, right through that red light! VIPs don’t need to stop!” and “No need to park in a driveway when you can double-park in the bike lane!” and, to pedestrians, “Please, take your time crossing against the light. Your time’s more important than everyone else’s!”
I notice that the objects of my enthusiasm often respond with vulgar insults, obscene gestures and threats of violence. Am I missing something? Has my cheerleading been a breach of good manners?
GENTLE READER: Why, those people are just cheerleading you when they encourage you to do something to yourself. It is true that your insults are less crudely worded, but they are clearly insults, and they inspire retaliatory insults.
You started it. And Miss Manners is asking you to stop. You are making a public nuisance of yourself. Even she does not have license to go around the streets, criticizing people unasked. It is rude, and the only change it makes in behavior is for the worse.