DEAR MISS MANNERS: I see people giving congratulatory toasts to people -- wedding couples, winning contestants, etc. -- and I always see the toastees joining in by drinking along with the toasters. Is this proper, to drink to themselves? Doesn’t seem correct to me.
GENTLE READER: It isn’t. But either raising their glasses when everyone else does is irresistible, or they don’t know how to assume the modest smiling look that such a gesture requires. Miss Manners promises that they can drink as soon as the others put their glasses down. They can even follow the toast by saying, “And to all our dear friends,” which would require everyone else to restrain themselves.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)