DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband is a paraplegic and uses a wheelchair. When we became engaged, friends, family, colleagues and even acquaintances thought absolutely nothing of asking me whether he was sexually capable and able to father children.
Not wanting any bit of that conversation, I would normally reply with “How would I possibly know?” and then change the subject immediately.
I thought that these sort of inquiries would end when we were married and I became pregnant, but now the same people are asking me how my child was conceived, and if artificial means were required.
My husband is good mannered and laughs off these sort of offensive questions, but I’m afraid that I’m much more irritated. I need a proper line of defense from Miss Manners before I really blow my top.
GENTLE READER: No, no, Miss Manners would have you take an opposite tone -- that of a patient parent having a difficult conversation with a curious young child:
“Well, it’s like this: When two people love each other and want to be close ...” Then you can trail off with, “Wait -- I don’t know you well enough to be having this conversation. Surely there must be someone in your family who will explain to you how babies are made.”