Miss Manners by Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin

Traditions Change, But Acknowledging Grief Still Matters

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am an adult who is not on any social media. My theory is, if you love me, you’ll call me. I don’t feel the need to see what everyone is doing 24 hours a day.

With that being said, I have friends who feel they have to check their phones during dinner ”with the girls.”

I sat the other night with three grown women continually checking their phones, showing me pictures of people I don’t know or care about. I go to dinner with friends to be with them, not their phones.

Apparently it showed on my face, because one of the girls called me the next day to see if I was OK. I did not say anything; I know I should. I realize that they feel social media is important to keeping up with people, but there is a place and time.

GENTLE READER: One friend did call you when she saw that you were upset. Of course you should have told her -- instead of Miss Manners -- why. You should tell all of them.

It is not insulting to say, “Well, I really would like to be with you. Can we have a no-phones meal where we can talk without interruptions?”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)