Miss Manners by Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin

Gift From the Heart Should Be Accepted With Grace

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife is part of a large group of friends, and lately, when this group throws a party, the person organizing the party includes a request that attendees wear a specific color.

If you are a participant in a wedding, I understand the desire that folks be attired in matching colors, but now these ladies in the group are telling guests they have to wear clothes of a specific color. Is this some new requirement that I have not heard of, or are these requests getting out of line?

GENTLE READER: While this sounds as silly to Miss Manners as it does to you, she notes that neither of us is a member of this group. If your wife and her friends want to maintain wardrobes in multiple colors to attend occasional little costume parties, it is not our business to interfere. And if it is your wife who objects, she should open a discussion with the group.