DEAR MISS MANNERS: I extended a single invite, one month in advance, for Thanksgiving and provided an RSVP date of Nov. 20. On Nov. 10, they thanked me, talked about their pending options and said they had not yet decided.
I have now been invited to another home and want to handle this correctly. Do I wait to hear back by the 19th, or is the expectation midnight on the 20th?
With social media tools, is email OK to wish my invited guest well on Thanksgiving and mention our new plans? Or, should I call -- and if so, what if I have to leave a message? I would like to join an extended family that is equally important to our lives.
GENTLE READER: You should have checked with Miss Manners before issuing a generous deadline. Without one, you could reasonably have expected an answer within a few days, and asked for a definitive one now. The best you can do is to plead that you find that you need to know -- without mentioning that you could do better.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)