DEAR MISS MANNERS: My ex-husband and I remained friendly after our divorce in 1979. He passed away 23 years ago. I have never remarried, and now I do not see myself as a divorcee, but a widow. Would it be incorrect to call myself a widow?
GENTLE READER: It doesn't bother Miss Manners, and it certainly can't bother your former husband; presumably, he did not leave a subsequent widow. But if you want to be fastidious, you can achieve the same effect by saying simply, "My husband died."