DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend of mine borrowed my paint sprayer about a month ago. My paint sprayer was very expensive -- about $300 -- and I’ve only used it once. About two weeks later, he told me his wife filed for a divorce. How do I delicately ask for my property back in this situation? Should I ask him or his wife? I am not sure who has it now. -- Need It Back
DEAR NEED IT BACK: Your friend borrowed your paint sprayer. He is the one responsible for giving it back to you. Ask him right away to return it. That transaction should be simple and straightforward.
The impending divorce is a completely different matter. Be a good listener on this point. Do your best not to take sides. Ask your friend how he is doing and if he needs anything. Do not pass judgment on what’s going on between the two of them. Divorces can be messy, and friends often take sides. If you were friendly with both of them, do your best to stay neutral. Also, stay out of the details to the best of your ability. This truly is their business, not yours.
Your paint sprayer, on the other hand, is totally your business. Get it back before they start divvying things up and it gets lost in the shuffle.