DEAR MISS MANNERS: A young adult relative texts me a lovely greeting nearly every day, which I cherish so much. However, every single day, she makes the same two spelling mistakes.

I feel like I want to say something about it, but I don't know if it would be proper or even how I would say it. Her spelling mistakes are common ones that almost everyone knows about. She writes the phrase, "I love you more then you will know" -- "then" instead of "than."

The other phrase that she uses every single day is, "Your welcome" -- "your" instead of "you're."

She is married to my nephew, and I love her so very much. We have grown quite close. I don't ever want to hurt her or upset her.

But it irks me that she does this every day. She probably writes these phrases to all of her friends and other relatives, too.

I think I would appreciate it if someone would let me know if I misspelled a word over and over again. I keep wondering if it would be a kindness if I corrected her? Or should I just overlook it and try not to let it irk me?

GENTLE READER: A quick way to kill this correspondence would be to respond to expressions of affection with a report card.

Anyway, Miss Manners suspects that those admittedly annoying errors may not even be the fault of your nice niece-in-law. Texting apps are notorious for guessing the word being typed and finishing it with the wrong guess. And the repetition may be because of stored phrases.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband (I am male) and I have been a couple for 38 years. When we're out in public (shopping, etc.), we don't engage in even mild displays of affection (something we dislike seeing others engage in publicly, no matter the genders involved).

Still, after this long together, I'm sure we have an evident rapport and way of interacting that may seem familial to others.

On a regular basis (a couple of times per month), we're asked by clerks, random strangers, etc., "Are you brothers?" We find the question puzzling and invasive, as if to suggest that it's somehow abnormal for adult siblings to be in public together (if that were the case here).

What these people are picking up on, and why they feel inclined to either confirm or reject whatever connection they seem to be constructing in their minds, is a mystery.

I've been inclined to say, "Yes, we are," and dispense with the invasion. Yet, on my better days, I want to ask (but don't), "Why are you asking?" And on my less-good days, I want to say, "What (expletive) business is it of yours?"

Is there a more appropriate way of responding to the uninvited (and unwanted) invasion of our privacy?

GENTLE READER: The answer to the mystery of why people ask about all sorts of matters that are none of their business is 1. They are nosy and 2. They lack the filter of tact.

But Miss Manners would have thought that the answer you need supply is a simple "No," in a tone intended to shut down further inquiry.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Since moving to a new area, I've found that people ask where my family is from and react oddly when I confess that I don't know.

We are white, and we have lived in the rural South for generations. Growing up, it never seemed strange to me that we had no other explanation for our presence there. My great-grandparents were all born in the American South, and they never mentioned any ancestry from anywhere else.

Since moving to a large city in the North, the topic of heritage has come up a few times in conversation. When people ask, I say the name of my home state. They then elaborate, asking where we come from, and I have to explain that I don't know where my family is "from." I know, of course, that we must have immigrated at some point, but I don't know from where.

People here seem to find this very strange. Several have recommended I take a DNA test or investigate my genealogy, with some going so far as to ask, shocked, why I haven't done this already.

I don't have a good answer; it's just that it isn't important to me.

I have, however, taken offense on more than one occasion when people have said that we "must have something to hide," such as slave ownership, connections to the Nazi party or other such historical horrors.

Given my lack of information, I can't in good faith deny anything outright, but when did this become an acceptable thing to accuse someone of? Why is it so strange to people that I don't know where we are from? How can I politely respond to their questions and occasional accusations?

GENTLE READER: Said once, to a newcomer, "Where are you from?" may be a harmless conversation opener. Said repeatedly, even after receiving an answer, is not.

A lady-in-waiting to the late Queen Elizabeth found that out the hard way. At a charitable function in Buckingham Palace, she kept pressing a Black guest to tell where she was "really from," despite that lady's having repeatedly said that she was British-born. She also touched the guest's hair, brushing it aside to see her name tag.

After her behavior was denounced by the palace, and she resigned from the royal household under pressure, the offender apologized to that British guest.

The racial element may have been lacking in your case, but it is nonetheless rude to press people to disclose their supposed origins, and atrociously rude to suggest that only shame could prevent them from answering nosy questions.

Miss Manners is aware that this intrusiveness has become common in these identity-conscious days. But there is an essential difference between wanting to know about one's own family and demanding an accounting from others.

Just repeat, as did the guest at Buckingham Palace, "I told you where I was from." And cut off insults by walking away.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: At a family gathering, should guests help with cleanup?

GENTLE READER: That depends. Are you a parent whose children are lounging around while you do all the work? Then you should assign them tasks.

Or are you the adult child who doesn't want parents messing in your kitchen? Then you should assure them that you enjoy pampering them for a change.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm the author of three published books. I came to writing late in life, but enjoy excellent reviews and decent sales. I have managed to secure an agent, an editor and a publishing contract.

I met a slightly older writer at a conference a few years ago. My colleague has more books to their name, and their success seems to have come earlier in their career. As we got to know each other better, I was surprised by several rather forceful requests that I read and comment on their work-in-progress. Requests to read my own work-in-progress followed in short order.

Naively, I agreed, which precipitated several specific, unsolicited responses: "You should submit to publisher X." "You should work with this editor." "You should write for a broader audience," and so forth.

While I believe the individual is well-intended, their directives are a source of major frustration. I've repeatedly said "no, thank you" to subsequent requests to see my unfinished work, stressing that I am more comfortable showing my efforts once they are completed, not "under construction."

Nothing I say seems to make a difference; the demands just keep coming. I've grown increasingly angry. It's come to the point that I avoid communication with this person and share only the vaguest descriptions of my projects.

I sense my colleague wants to be needed, and is perhaps wistful for the publishing marketplace of his early career. I'm hesitant to cease communication altogether, but the constant interventions have to stop. Short of abandoning the friendship, I'm at a loss as to what more I can do or say.

GENTLE READER: Blame it on your publishing team: "I am afraid that it's too confusing to consider going in a different direction from my editors. Too many cooks, and all." And then Miss Manners suggests that you find other authors with whom to talk shop -- then you can discuss their work with this person, rather than your own.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have worked and served in a number of high-profile local positions, and have had the good fortune to meet many wonderful people. I am often approached with greetings when I go to stores, restaurants, etc.

The problem is that even though these people look familiar, occasionally I cannot remember their names or how we originally came into contact years ago. They know me on sight, by name, but sometimes I haven't a clue as to who they are.

Their greetings are always friendly and I am always polite, responding as though I know them. But is there a polite way to ask their name without offending them?

GENTLE READER: "You are so good to remember me. Please remind me of your name and how we met? I am afraid that my memory is not as good."

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)