DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife and I were invited to a dinner party by a childhood friend of mine, whom we have seen occasionally over the past 50 years.
At dinner, the host pulled me aside and asked about my political views, to which I responded, "I believe my views will differ from your own. We don't see each other often, so let's just enjoy the evening."
He kept pushing, and I gave him my full opinion. He then asked what my wife's views were. I responded by saying, "Pretty much like my own." The host just exploded, freaking out, etc.
Before returning to the group, I again requested we just put our views aside and enjoy the evening. The host then entered the kitchen, where my wife was assisting his wife, and asked her if she supports the same political party as me. My wife responded, "Yes!"
My wife and I stayed through dinner. Three days later, we sent a respectful thank-you card. How should we have reacted to this attack, both in the short term and the long term?
GENTLE READER: In the short term, you and your wife did the best you could under unpleasant circumstances.
In the long term, Miss Manners recommends that you consider whether you want to maintain this relationship. Childhood history notwithstanding, a friend does not aggressively lure you into conflict -- and then chastise you for taking the bait.