DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'd like to have a party for my daughter's fourth birthday. However, I'd like to avoid getting a bunch of plastic junk that she'll look at once and then throw in a corner and never play with.
I honestly don't think gifts are necessary, but I know many people feel obligated to bring one. So I have two ideas for how to address this:
1. I could request that anyone who'd like to provide a gift contribute $5 in advance of the party, and then I could get her one gift that I know she'd enjoy. (I'd love it if someone requested this for their kid's party, since it would mean I wouldn't have to go shopping. And it would cost significantly less than a junk toy!)
2. I could request that attendees provide a gift that's an artistic activity, like a coloring book or building set.
Are either of these ideas in poor taste? I'm really trying to avoid waste -- and wasteful spending -- but I also don't want to offend anyone.
GENTLE READER: Then accept graciously whatever people choose to give, and teach your daughter to do the same.
Miss Manners notices that this is an opportunity to teach another lesson: Have your daughter select the items she will not use (presuming that her taste actually aligns with yours), and explain the value of giving them to a charitable organization for children who may enjoy them.