DEAR ABBY: My spouse and I work at the college where we were undergraduates. The school has a strong reunion tradition, and thousands of alumni come with their families to relive their college days. We live here year-round and are sort of done with reminiscing.
In years past, I've had boundary issues with former classmates who come to town assuming they can stay at our house (without asking) and think we want to entertain them late into the night. We had to implement a "no classmates at the house" rule, and most people understand we'd prefer to visit them on campus.
However, one former classmate is oddly persistent and asked if she can come "see" our house. When I said I'm not entertaining guests, she asked if she could come and look around without me. (Clearly no.) Then she asked if she could just walk by my house and see what it looks like from the outside, which I can't control, but is pretty weird since I made it clear I was looking for privacy.
How do I set boundaries with someone who wants to stand on the sidewalk and stare in my windows? We were friends 15 years ago, but are not close now. They are coming again in the near future and it's already stressing me out. -- CAREER COLLEGIAN IN THE MIDWEST
DEAR COLLEGIAN: While you can't prevent a pushy person from looking at your house from the sidewalk, you can tell her that her persistence is making you uncomfortable and to please stop. You might also point out that if you feel like having a visitor, the invitation will come from you and not vice versa.