DEAR ABBY: I am trying hard to let go of my paralyzing fear of driving, which has prevented me from getting a license. I am not sure why I get so nervous and afraid when I get behind the wheel. I really need a car to get my family and myself around. I just wish I knew what was causing this. Could you please help me figure it out? -- FEAR OF DRIVING

DEAR F.O.D.: Gladly. The quickest way to get to the bottom of what's causing your fear of driving would be to discuss it with a licensed mental health professional -- if possible, one who specializes in treating patients with phobias. Your physician or your health insurance company should be able to refer you to someone who is qualified.

DEAR ABBY: A few months ago, my wife and I invited another couple over for dinner. The husband was on his phone the entire time, showing us YouTube videos he apparently thought were interesting. After dinner, he lamented that he had run out of data and wanted us to provide our Wi-Fi password so he could continue watching his videos. I begrudgingly gave him access, but was really irked by it. Isn't it rude for a dinner guest to ask to use your Wi-Fi? -- NOT SO INTERESTED

DEAR NOT SO INTERESTED: It was not rude to ask for your Wi-Fi password. In some circles, it's normal. What was rude was for one guest to monopolize the conversation the way that dinner guest did. I'll bet it will be a long time before you invite that couple again.

DEAR ABBY: I need help dealing with a neighbor problem. "Diane" and I have been neighbors for five years. We both have daughters in elementary school who ride the bus. At the bus stop, Diane always manages to point out something about my daughter or me that makes me uncomfortable. She'll ask things like, "Are those new shoes?" "I like that jacket. Was it expensive?" "You have a new hairdo; did it cost much?" Or "Wow, how can you afford such nice clothes for your daughter?" "Are those new jeans? How much were they?"

I find her prying annoying and quite rude. Most of the other parents avoid her, probably because of this behavior. I work to afford the things I have, and I don't feel I need to discuss what I spend for my child or myself with anyone. Other than this, she's a nice neighbor. What's the best way to get her to stop asking these questions? I try to ignore them, but this has been going on for years, and I'm at a loss. -- ANNOYED IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR ANNOYED: The surest way to get your neighbor to stop asking these kinds of questions would be the direct approach. Tell her questions of that nature make you uncomfortable and to please stop asking. If she persists, repeat it until she finally gets the message.

DEAR ABBY: Our 24-year-old grandson "Raffy," a college grad from a respected technical institution, couldn't find a job for a year after graduation. He has been living with us for more than six months without paying rent because we wanted to help him get on his feet. Currently, his only responsibility is helping somewhat after dinner. He now has a good job.

I should mention that Raffy tends to be narcissistic. He frequently wears his baseball hat to meals, even though I have asked him not to. He can also be difficult to deal with, attacking me when there's a difference of opinion or if he's angry about something.

We live in a three-bedroom condo. What rules are legitimate for me to require? Can I ask him to keep his room straight and take his hat off at meals or when going out for dinner? How much room and board should we ask for?

We have frequent guests -- family, our friends, his friends -- because we live close to the beach in Florida. Space gets to be a big issue, and he refuses to allow visiting cousins to sleep in his room, even though there are two double beds. I welcome your input, Abby. -- OUT OF CONTROL IN FLORIDA

DEAR OUT OF CONTROL: You seem to have forgotten that the condo Raffy lives in belongs to you. Because it is your home, and he has been living rent-free, you should be making the rules. It's time to sit him down and tell him together that if he wants to continue living there, he will:

1. Keep his room neat at all times.

2. Remove his hat during the meals he shares with you.

3. Allow the visiting cousins to use the extra bed in "his" room -- which is really your guest room.

4. I hesitate to suggest you ask him for money because if you turn the arrangement into a business deal, you may lose leverage. But I do think you should set a deadline for your gainfully employed (but difficult) grandson to leave. With the money he has been socking away on rent, he should be able to accumulate enough to afford a place of his own.

DEAR ABBY: As kids, we were taught not to kiss on the mouth (unless a spouse or romantic partner). We never kissed our children on the mouth and felt disgusted when we witnessed it.

We see it happen all the time now, especially on TV. It never happened in the '50s and '60s. Is my family wrong? -- HOLDING BACK IN HAMILTON, OHIO

DEAR HOLDING BACK: It's a matter of personal preference and upbringing. Giving a family member a peck on the lips is neither right nor wrong, and I have certainly never considered a parent or sibling showing affection in this way to be shocking or disgusting. Readers, what do you think?

DEAR ABBY: I paid $5,000 for a seven-day cruise with my grandkids. All I asked was for them to pack a carry-on and a backpack. My granddaughter and son are having a problem with it. I tried explaining that I'm handicapped and do not want to check a large bag for her because it's a convenience issue. There's laundry service onboard the ship.

When I went to help her pack, my son said I was being unreasonable, and is now threatening to cancel our time with our grandchildren! My husband and I are heartbroken. He ordered us to leave his home and said we were being ridiculous! I don't know what to think.

Am I being unreasonable? We never told them how much we have spent. We just explained that a checked bag would cause us more stress. We also rented a compact car for after our cruise to take the grands, who are 15 and 16, to the mall and a theme park. We don't understand the big deal. -- CRUISER GRANDMA

DEAR CRUISER: Your letter proves the truth of the adage "no good deed goes unpunished." To say your son overreacted would be an understatement.

As hosts, you and your husband have the right to issue some guidelines. Inexperienced travelers are often tempted to overpack, and that appears to be true here. If you haven't raised the subject with your son of the cost of the cruise and your worry about hauling around large pieces of luggage in the small rented car, you should. At least then he will understand why you have given "the grands" a limit. If they want to bring larger bags, the kids should be responsible for paying whatever additional cost there might be. At 15 and 16, both should also be able to lug around their own suitcases. It's a teaching opportunity!

DEAR ABBY: A friend of mine had a baby several months ago. She behaves like she's the first and only woman ever to have given birth. It has consumed her to the point that she sends me at least half a dozen photos a day. When I try to shift the conversation to other things, she invariably brings the topic back to her baby. She left my wedding early without saying goodbye (she was in the wedding party!) to go be with her baby.

I wonder if giving her a subtle reality check would be helpful, or if it would destroy our friendship. I'd love for it to continue, but it seems like a one-way street. -- FRUSTRATED FRIEND

DEAR FRUSTRATED: Before giving your friend a reality check, I suggest giving yourself one. Your friend doesn't talk about anything else but the baby because nothing else is as important to her. By sending you those pictures, she isn't trying to annoy you. She's trying to include you in watching her precious little one develop. Because this bothers you to the extent that you would write to me about it, take a step back for a while rather than say anything to her that you may later regret.