DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I think my boyfriend is beautiful, and I tell him that often, and have since we started out together in college. Even then he was beginning to lose his hair, but it was less obvious then than it is now. His thinning hair didn’t bother me then, and it doesn’t now. But it clearly bothers him, and whenever he is out and/or with people other than me and our immediate families and a few of his oldest friends, he constantly wears a baseball cap. He even wears one at work, where most of the other guys do too at least.
We have started talking about getting married, and I have this picture in my mind of him wearing a baseball cap at the wedding. That doesn’t bother me as much as how his balding makes him feel.
What can I do to convince him it really isn’t a big deal to be balding? --- LOVE HIM AS HE IS
DEAR LOVE HIM AS HE IS: Your boyfriend’s thinning hair may not be a big deal to you, but it clearly is to him. Unlike graying hair, which can be easily addressed in most cases, hair loss is a more complicated issue for many people.
If he’s open to the idea, you could help him explore medically sound options to slow down or prevent further loss. If he isn’t open to that route, then I believe by continuing to reassure him that you’re happy with him just as he is and going along with his cap-wearing, you’re doing what you can to bolster his confidence and allowing him to pursue his own self-image enhancement needs.