The Housing Scene by Lew Sichelman


Who says real estate professionals don't have a sense of humor?

A few weeks ago, members of the ActiveRain real estate community were asked what they thought would be a suitable neck tattoo for realty agents. And some of the responses were nothing short of brilliant.

Oh sure, there were the usual number of naysayers who were aghast that agents would even consider such a thing. Totally inappropriate, they moaned.

They are correct, of course. Such tattoos are absolutely out of keeping with professionalism.

But that didn't stop some folks from answering with wit and aplomb, in the joking spirit with which the question was posed in the first place. Here's a sampling of the suggested neck tats:

-- "I'm Gorgeous Inside" (Tracy Dowling, Holleran Real Estate, Raleigh, North Carolina)

-- "On Parole, Now Selling's My Goal" (Rich Bosselmann, Koa Realty, Kona, Hawaii)

-- "No Ragrets" (Christina Reid, RE/MAX Town & Country, West Grove, Pennsylvania)

-- "A Flesh-Colored Tattoo of a Neck" (James Lowenstern, Castles Unlimited, Newton, Massachusetts)

-- "This End Up" (Annette Lawrence, RE/MAX Realtec Group, Palm Harbor, Florida)

-- "A Noose" (Susan Emo, Sotheby's International, Kingston, Ontario)

-- "Blond But Pending" (Myrl Jeffcoat, GreatWest Realty, Sacramento, California)

-- "White Picket Fence With Daisies" (Jesse Castro, JK Realty, Gilbert, Arizona)

-- "Stickin' My Neck Out for Clients" (Victoria Marshall, Buyer's Edge, Bethesda, Maryland)

-- "Sold" (Ralph Gorgoglione, John Aaroe Group, Los Angeles)

-- "If You Lived Here, You'd Be Home Now" (Curt Warner, Kirkland, Washington)

-- "$" (Robert Hicks, United Country River City Realty, Savannah, Tennessee)

-- "Rent This Space" (Gene Riemenschneider, Home Point Real Estate, Brentwood, California)

-- "Cut Here" (Nathan Gesner, American West Realty, Cody, Wyoming)

-- "I'll Stick My Neck Out For You" (Gesner, again)

-- "Inquire Within" (Alex Piccirillo, Nest Seekers International, East Hampton, New York)

-- "Ask Me About My Tattoo" (Jerry Lucas, ABC Legal Documents, Colorado Springs)

-- "Make An Offer" (Andy Freeman, Parks Real Estate, Nashville, Tennessee)

-- "Sign Here" (Larry Lawfer, YourStories Real Estate, Westwood, Massachusetts)

-- "Career Killer" (Tammy Adams, Maricopa Real Estate, Maricopa, Arizona)

Streets in your neighborhood falling apart? Potholes blowing out your car's front end?

If your development is registered with the Interstate Land Sales Full Disclosure Act, it seems you can bypass the local authorities and call on the feds to get the necessary repairs made.

In an unusual case, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau has come down on a Florida land developer that failed to maintain the roads of a Tennessee lot sales project that was marketed across state lines. "In fact, the roads have not been maintained, and have not been accepted by the county," the CFPB found.

According to a Facebook page set up by one disgruntled buyer: "Our beautiful development has been abandoned by the developer. If you have not visited your property recently, I encourage you to do so and witness the deterioration of the roads. It looks nothing like it did when lots were being sold."

How can an agency created to protect people from financial harm ride herd over streets? Well, when the bureau was started five years ago, certain Department of Housing and Urban Development regulations were transferred to it for enforcement. Among them was the land act, which sets rules on how developments in which lots are sold across state lines must be marketed.

And since the Florida-based International Land Consultants made various representations about the roads in Hawks Bluff outside of Chattanooga -- namely, that it would maintain roads in the development until they were turned over to Van Buren County -- and since the roads had yet to be accepted by the county, the watchdog agency has ordered the company to live up to its promises.