DEAR ABBY: I'd like advice on how to handle a problem that crops up every time family members invite me out to a dinner they are paying for.
I know the rule of etiquette is to order an item that's the same or less than what the host is ordering, but I am often asked to order first. This means I have no idea what the payer's meal will cost. If it means ordering something on the menu other than what I'd rather have -- a burger instead of a steak -- in that case, should I offer to pay for my own meal? What if they won't hear of taking any money from me? Can I still order the steak since my offer to pay was refused? -- LIKES TO FOLLOW THE RULES
DEAR LIKES: A way to get around ordering first might be to say, "I haven't decided yet. I'd like to hear what the others are ordering." However, if you would be uncomfortable doing that, and your hosts won't let you have a separate check, be a gracious guest and enjoy every bite of your steak dinner.