DEAR ABBY: My ex and I were together 17 years. He was a cheater, a liar, and any other way a horrible husband can be described. I divorced him six years ago.
My problem is a few of our kids think he's a wonderful guy. The older one (25) lived with him until a few months ago. I don't know how to make her understand how horrible he is. I think if she stepped back for a while, she would see it, but she (and several of his other kids) have been completely brainwashed.
She's very quick to ask a question, but when I respond in a way she feels is negative about her dad, she suddenly has to hang up or needs to go do something. I'm lost trying to make her see how their part of the family looks like a cult to everyone else in the family. -- KNOWS THE TRUTH IN OHIO
DEAR KNOWS: Trying to reason with your daughter is a waste of time. Trying to "deprogram" your children from the "cult" of loving their father isn't working, so quit trying. By persisting, you will only drive a wedge between you. As you stated, once they have stepped back, they may begin to see the light without help from you. Let it happen on its own.