DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for 20 years. I have used my maiden name since we were married. His daughter still insists on addressing mail to me using my husband's last name, even though I have never used it and have signed documents for her using my correct name.
I have asked him to remind his daughter what my name is. He is very sensitive to anything construed as criticism of his daughter, so I need to know of a diplomatic way to ask again. -- NOT MY NAME IN THE WEST
DEAR NOT MY NAME: Do not ask your husband to do what you need to do. Are you at all close to his daughter? The time has come to do something you should have done well over a decade ago. Talk with her and ask why she persists in doing something she knows annoys you. Is she intellectually challenged? Forgetful? From where I sit, it seems like a passive-aggressive attempt to get your goat.