DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married for decades, but 10 years ago she had, at the least, a texting affair with "Brad," a longtime friend of her brother's. Her brother, who knows about the affair, lives on a large tract of land owned by their father. Brad is there often to go hunting with her brother. My wife and I used to visit frequently, but now there is some concern that Brad might be there and we'll have a conflict, so we don't go as much. The affair was very upsetting to me, but my wife insisted we keep it quiet so her brother could continue his friendship with Brad.
Over the years, she has occasionally had online contact with Brad and even told him that she appreciated him talking with our son because our son has few friends. But now our son, who knows nothing about the affair or how bad it hurt me, has become friendly with Brad. It is very difficult hearing him talk about things they do together. Should we tell our son about the affair? -- STILL HURT IN TEXAS
DEAR STILL HURT: Tempting as it may be to "out" your wife to your son, keep that information to yourself. I question the wisdom of Brad having been encouraged to cultivate a relationship with your son since this friendship is the fruit of that decision. Because you prefer not to hear what your son and Brad are doing, the next time it comes up, change the subject. He may or may not catch on and question you about the reason, but if he does, all you need to say is you'd rather not discuss it.