DEAR ABBY: Several months ago, a friend of mine behaved badly and offended me and another dinner guest. His wife shut him down fairly quickly. The next day, when I tried to explain to him why what he did was inappropriate, he misinterpreted my comments and, because of his low self-esteem, became offended even though he was the offensive person. I immediately apologized but got no response. Anyone who understands basic psychology will recognize this defensive and deflective self-defense mechanism for what it was.
Abby, these are people I love dearly. Now they no longer speak to me, and I'm at a loss about what to do besides continue to pray for them. Advice? -- MISSING MY DEAREST FRIENDS
DEAR MISSING: Your former friend appears to be both aggressive and hypersensitive. Continue praying, but be careful what you pray for because this person appears to be very high-maintenance. Surely you can fill the emptiness with friends who are easier to get along with and who are willing to talk out difficult situations like adults. If you do, I guarantee your life will be less stressful.