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by Abigail Van Buren

Anger Over Medical Bills Continues to Poison Marriage

DEAR ABBY: After being in a bad marriage for 40 years, I finally left my husband in 2011. After two years of separation and therapy, we reconciled. During the time I was gone, he leaned on his longtime friends for support and shared lots of personal information about me, some of which was untrue.

The other evening while we were having dinner and drinks, a mutual friend and I were talking about health, and I told him I was hiding a certain hip problem from my husband. He asked why, because my husband had told him about it years ago. (I can't imagine why.)

The reason I left was my husband's anger at me over a hospital emergency room bill. I told this friend that my husband's concern for my health is not sincere because he had recently blown up at me for mentioning an upcoming doctor visit. I am on Medicare. Now I'm worried that I may have wrecked their friendship by revealing how uncaring a husband he really is. How did I get here? -- QUESTIONING MYSELF

DEAR QUESTIONING: How did you get here? You got here by remarrying a man who has such a big issue with spending money on health. If you stay with him, it could be catastrophic.

Read more in: Marriage & Divorce | Health & Safety