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by Abigail Van Buren

Man's Failure to Pay Bills Puts House and Marriage in Jeopardy

DEAR ABBY: Seven years ago, I found out my husband hadn't paid our mortgage and credit card bills for more than two years, and our home of 23 years was in preforeclosure. Once the secret was out, we managed to save the house (thankfully).

Problem is, I no longer trust my husband and often doubt what he says. My priority was to save our home, but now I am no longer sure I want to stay with him. Our 40th anniversary is this year, but I feel bitter and resentful about his irresponsible decisions. I want to leave, but I'm scared I am making the wrong decision. Help, please. -- MIXED UP IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR MIXED UP: Because I have no idea why your husband behaved so irresponsibly, you need to hash this out with a licensed marriage and family therapist. You should also consult an attorney. If you decide to stay, it is imperative that you be in a position to closely monitor any financial actions and obligations in your household.

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